You’ve probably seen the videos all over the web of themed restaurants in Tokyo.
Restaurants with Robots, Vampires, Cats, Prisoners, and so on.
When I saw those videos I was definitely intrigued.
So much so, that I made it a mission to visit as many of those restaurants as I could.
I ended up going to 6 themed restaurants in Tokyo.
Unfortunately, I was letdown by what most of those places had to offer.
ALCATRAZ E.R. RESTAURANT(Shibuya District).
One of the restaurants I was most excited to visit was Alcatraz E.R.
The theme is a prison that does medical procedures on their prisoners.
Seemed interesting enough.
Entering the restaurant was exciting.
Loud music and weird noises blasted throughout the place and the decor was really cool.
A nurse(waitress) guided me to my prison cell(dining area).
I had a top cell, so I had to walk up stairs to a low ceiling area.
Then crawl past other cells to get to mine at the end.
The nurse followed with the menu.
She gave me a rolled up wet cloth(“soft dick”) for washing my hands.
Then she showed me a metal bar(“hard dick”) that I use to bang on the bars when I need to order.
The menu is the best part of the restaurant with the names and presentation of the food and drinks.
Most of the dishes have been sexualized.
While others are meant to be more disgusting.
Some drinks you stir by using a vibrator and one dessert looks like chunky blood served on a maxi-pad.
Like most of these restaurants, the food and drinks are overpriced.
So I went with a cheap option of ordering a 5-cheese pizza.
I banged my “hard dick” on the bars, the nurse arrived, I ordered, and off she went.
Now for the letdown.
During this time I decided to leave my cell and check the place out.
As soon as I made it down the stairs the nurse told me to stay in my cell and not walk around.
But she didn’t say it like it was part of the act.
She was actually quite bitchy about it.
So I went to my cell and waited.
Later that night when I went online to their site.
I noticed the picture gallery had entire sections of the restaurant that I didn’t even get to see.
I was only able to see the “ICU”.
When my “pizza” arrived it made me glad I went for something cheap.
It was basically a 6 inch tortilla with BARELY any cheese on it.
It was supposed to be 5-cheeses.
If I stacked 5 cheese slices together and melted them it still would’ve been thicker than what arrived on my plate.
I folded it in half, finished it in 3 bites and left.
The theme, decor, and set-up of the restaurant was pretty good.
The menu was funny and creative.
But the staff was rude, the atmosphere was OK, and the food sucked.
They could make that place much better.
SPENT: 1890 Yen, 500 Yen entrance fee included.
Aside from Maid Cafes, the Cat Cafes seem like some of the most visited themed restaurants in Tokyo.
First off, these places are not restaurants.
They should hardly be considered cafes.
They’re basically a room full of cats.
For 500 yen you get a cup of tea and one hour to play with cats that don’t want to play with you.
Let’s face it, cats are assholes.
Even cat owners know cats are assholes.
These cats are no different.
They’ve been bothered by a bunch of people yesterday and they’ll be bothered by a bunch of people tomorrow.
You’re nothing special and they know that.
You might be lucky to find one that’s not sleeping and actually wants to play with you.
But chances are they don’t give a shit.
SPENT: 900 Yen, 500 Yen entrance fee included.
CRISTON CAFE(Shinjuku District).
Before going to this place I knew it wasn’t anything special as far as the menu or attire of the waiters.
It’s just basically a restaurant that had a Catholic Church decor.
I arrived right when it opened.
I was the first one in the restaurant and I thought I’d be seated in the main area.
Instead I was seated in a side room.
The entrance to the toilets and a wine rack were the only things to look at.
Thanks guys, it really brings out the feeling of the place.
I walked out into the main area to look around and didn’t see anything special about the place at all.
My food was actually good though, but nothing too special.
I also have no idea why they call it a Cafe because it’s clearly a restaurant.
On certain nights they even clear out the main room so they can convert it into a Goth club.
Which I thought was pretty funny considering the whole “Catholic” theme.
SPENT: 1868 Yen.
VAMPIRE CAFE(Ginza District).
The Vampire Cafe was a restaurant that did just enough to be considered good.
They didn’t have any “Wow Factor”, but they still did well enough for me to enjoy it.
The whole decor of the restaurant was black with red velvet everywhere.
There were skulls and roses placed throughout.
And most of the restaurant was lit by (fake)candlelight.
The male staff looked like vampires from Interview With The Vampire.
And the female staff had long black dresses and corsets.
Goth kids would love it.
Most of the seating are in booths with curtains.
Because apparently vampires aren’t very social eaters.
However, if you arrive with a big group there is a large table for you and your bloodsucking guests.
The drink menu was in the shape of a coffin.
And the food menu looked like a bible with most items priced at 666 yen.
The food portion was really small(even for Japanese standards), but it tasted good.
As a whole, this place was better than I expected.
SPENT: 1799 Yen.
KAWAII MONSTER CAFE(Shibuya District).
Monster Cafe is a themed restaurant I heard about but didn’t have on my list.
Not until I heard people talking about how it.
Most agreed it was one of the best themed restaurants in Tokyo.
The name of this place is a little deceiving because it has nothing to do with monsters at all.
Monster Cafe is more similar to an Alice In Wonderland acid trip type of restaurant.
There’s a lot of nonsensical things in the decor, but that’s what makes it that much cooler.
Unexpected Dance Party.
I thought the restaurant only had cool decor and staff in weird outfits.
But ten minutes after arriving a waitress had everyone go to the center of the restaurant.
Then 3 staff members danced and performed to ridiculous music for about 5 minutes.
It was unexpected and highly entertaining.
The staff also encourage you to walk around and take pics of the whole restaurant.
The food is all over priced and there’s no real meal except for the burger with fries.
I only ordered cereal and ice cream.
Monster Cafe was definitely the highlight of all the themed restaurants I went to.
I would recommend it to be the only themed restaurant to visit if you have a short stay in Tokyo.
SPENT: 2200 Yen, 500 Yen entrance fee included.
ROBOT RESTAURANT(Kabukicho District).
Without a doubt one of the most popular themed restaurants in Tokyo is the Robot Restaurant.
I’ll admit I was going to this place with high expectations.
I met some people that said I should bring those expectations down.
Unfortunately, they were completely right.
The Robot Restaurant was a huge letdown to me.
First off, the admission to this place is insane.
$80 at the restaurant, $60 online!!!
I didn’t know about the online discount until after I already went there.
I arrived about 5 minutes too late from when the show began, but they told me I could still catch it from the beginning.
So they took me and a few others into this crazy decorated room of mirrors and fake jewels.
Then they told us to wait there for the first intermission.
So they lied.
They said we’d see it from the beginning and then they make us miss out on the first 15 minutes.
Right then and there I knew this place didn’t care and only wanted money.
Finally seeing the show.
After the first intermission we entered.
Once we found our seats, and intermission ended, the show continued.
It was fun and crazy nonsensical entertainment.
Trying to follow their story line was even more fun.
Something like Robots destroying the nature on Earth.
And animals fighting back to save the planet.
During that 2 hour show there were 4 intermissions in total.
The one I entered in on and 3 after that.
Each intermission was about 15 minutes long.
They’d try to sell you merchandise and food, like hot dogs and nachos.
So half of the show is performance and the other half is trying to sell you garbage.
The show itself is also as clunky as its website.
People with remotes controlled the “robots”.
And sometimes they just pushed them around the floor.
A lot of the props have wear and tear all over them and definitely need some upkeep.
Everything about the Robot Restaurant needs to be revamped.
Clean the slate and start fresh.
I have a feeling this place made boatloads of cash when it first opened its doors and it hasn’t stopped.
So they just keep cycling people through the doors with no regard to how bad things are starting to look.
As soon as they wanted my money for a show I was already late to I should have known.
They could’ve said “If you wait until the next showing you can see it from the beginning.“
The Robot Restaurant is definitely NOT WORTH the $80 at the door and it’s barely worth the $60 in advance.
If they cut those ticket prices in half to $40 and $30 then that would be more of what the show is worth.
It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t too bad either.
I’d save your money and go to Monster Cafe instead.
SPENT: 8000 Yen.
Would I recommend someone to go to themed restaurants in Tokyo?
Kawaii Monster Cafe was the best one.
If you REALLY like Cats or REALLY like Vampires then you might enjoy those 2 places.
But the others were a huge waste of money.
Have you visited many themed restaurants in Tokyo?
What were your favorites?
Let me know in the comments below.